Just kidding. I’m pretty convinced that depression isn’t real. 

Lately, I’ve been operating between two states of being: anxiety and sadness. I am at work right now, and I am feeling sadness. I don’t usually feel sadness at work because I am usually stressed at work but not about my work. This is a rare occurrence for me because I usually do not have enough sadness in me to write about my sadness. But, seeing as though I am sad right now, it seems that today is a rare day.

This is also a rare moment in another way. This is one of those rare moments where I can articulate why I am sad. It isn’t that things have happened to me recently; it is precisely that things have not happened that cause me to feel the sadness that I am feeling right now. It is an understanding that a state of temperance may actually be a state of permanence that is settling in my intuition. Perhaps this is my final resting state. Perhaps this is the final equilibrium that is the summation of all of my experiences thus far. Perhaps this is the judgment that has resulted from my lifetime of treachery.