There are a couple of beliefs that I have that I consider to be truths. I have a boring personality, I have had a boring childhood, I have a boring life. All of these beliefs revolves around the fundamental belief that I am a boring person. This is similar to the belief until 2007 that the housing market is strong. Or, more simply, that people will continue to pay their mortgages. And, as the result of this belief, there was an entire derivatives market constructed on speculation. For every homeowner, there were millions of dollars depending on the idea that people will pay their mortgages.

The thing is — I don’t actually care if I am a boring person, but I will continue to believe that I am a boring person regardless of whether conform to some sort of objective standard of boring or not. I do things because I am a boring person. If I am not a boring person, I will not do things. It is, in my head, as simple as that.

In the 1970s, there was the invention of the mortgaged-backed security (MBS). The payments from the bond depended on the continued payments of a series of low-risk mortgages and allowed individuals and banks to continuously earn money from the housing market. This, for me, was my acceptance that I was a boring person. It made sense at the time. It was my choice to invest. It allowed me to accumulate.

As a result, I developed personality traits. I learned how to write. I began reading books. I started to produce music. I learned how to use my DSLR. This is the accumulation of capital that allowed me to reinvest back into my personality, in this case through the accumulation of friends and the further development of my hobbies. This, similarly prior to the housing crisis, is the purchase of additional MBSs.

But then, somewhere along the line, the mortgaged-backed security turned into a series of subprime loans, and if I stop believing that I am a boring person, then my entire personality collapses.